You Said We Would Be Together Forever But I Had No Clue That Forever Came With An Expiration Date

Your words, “Forever, you and me babe,” are still echoing in my head. That word forever got imprinted in my mind and it’s making me replay memories of you and me in my head. The forever you were talking about should have lasted a lifetime. It should have lasted but it didn’t.

We had it all. That’s what hurts me the most. If perfection really existed, we were close. We would steal every free second to spend time together. We were so into each other body, mind, and soul. Those small, invaluable moments made me believe in forever. They made me wish for forever with you.

I loved all those sleepless nights we spent talking about anything that would cross our minds. I loved those mornings I would wake up by your side. God, even after all of this, I still cannot imagine seeing anything more beautiful than you on those mornings. Who would’ve thought that something so beautiful could hurt you so much?

I really didn’t see the end coming. Everything seemed fine. We were our old selves, spending time together, and texting or Snapchatting when we were apart. I see now you were preparing me for an ending. I just misread the signs. I guess when someone promises you forever, you are not looking for signs that it will all come to an end.

Forever in your dictionary meant until there were the first major bumps in the road. It meant being there when everything was serene and normal. We couldn’t solve our fights, they would just lead to even greater ones. All those talks about understanding and compromise went down the drain. I tried. I swear I tried but my words had no impact on you whatsoever. Not anymore.
I never imagined that forever would expire on the day I needed you the most. I just wanted someone to talk to. I just wanted your hug that would tell me that everything was OK. That you were there and that I had your support. I was there for you at your lowest and it tears my heart apart that you couldn’t do the same for me.

I guess you needed the happy, charming version of me. The one who smiled all the time. The one who was never weak. The one who didn’t get taken over by her life. I was that version for most of our relationship but life happens. Things bring you down.

I thought out of all the people out there, you would know that. You’ve been there. Maybe it was easier for you because you had me to lean on when days were unbearable. I guess I also have me, to stand alone and fight. I have no other option as you are no longer here. I have to be my own rock.

Relationships are about overcoming difficulties. They are about putting an effort in no matter the situation. They are about staying, simply being there for a person who was always there for you. Relationships are about the love that puts all of that in motion. The love I still have for you and can’t get out of my system.

I know I have to find that breaking point inside of me and let you go forever. I am just not quite there yet. I can’t figure out how to stop obsessing over someone who is clearly not even worth a single thought of mine. I will manage, I will learn how. You left me with no other choice when you walked away.

You left without a single meaningful word that could make up for all the pain I am feeling right now. You left for your own reasons that are still a mystery to me. But the way I see it, you left because you were meant to leave. Because you didn’t love me the way I loved you—unconditionally, wholeheartedly and with a love that lasts forever. Your love had an expiration date.

You left because you weren’t mine forever. You leaving proved that you are not the man for me. My forever is on his way, I can just feel it.