How To Emotionally Hurt A Narcissistic Man: 6 Effective Ways To Do It
1. Figure him out
If you really want to seek revenge on your narcissistic boyfriend, firstly you have to get inside of his head. I know this is the guy you had your future planned with and that you won’t want him to be different but if you want to hurt him effectively, you have to accept some things.
Firstly, you have to stop idealizing him and see him for who he really is. You need to accept that his personality is narcissistic and that he is toxic for you and that he will always be like this. If you want to seek revenge because you secretly hope that it will make him understand what he’s losing and that it will make him understand that he loves you, I have to tell you to call it quits right from the start because this can be very dangerous for you. But if you truly want to hurt him, you need to get inside of his head.
You need to think of his vulnerabilities and weaknesses, about the things that elevate him and about those which bring him down. Of course, you need to use all of this against him and to your own advantage. Although this is one of the hardest things to do, you need to find a way to shut down all of the emotions you have for him and you need to let your reason be your only guide. If you really want to hurt him, there is no place for your conscience or guilt here. You need to be sure that this is exactly what you want to do and if it is, you need to shut down any remorse you might have regarding this revenge. Just remember that this man has hurt you many times and every sign of regret will instantly vanish.
Also, you need to make it clear to yourself that your narcissistic man will never love you and that he is only disguised as irresistible and that you need to take love out of this equation. Additionally, don’t ever expect him to change toward you or any other woman in his future. You won’t teach him a lesson by hurting him because he will do all the things he has done to you to every woman who crosses his path. But what you will accomplish is getting your own personal satisfaction and that is what your goal should be.
2. Talk about his imperfections
Although many people assume that a narcissist is the one who has the control in the relationship, it only appears this way. As a matter of fact, every serious narcissist is actually quite vulnerable and he only pretends to be tough and self-confident while the reality is quite different. Once you understand that he chose to be with you because he needs you to boost his ego, you’ll also understand that you are actually in complete control of the situation and you’ll realize how easy it is to rock his world.
Although it doesn’t seem this way, all narcissists have a very fragile ego and their low self-confidence is their weakest spot. They act like they love themselves and like they think they are perfect but actually this couldn’t be further from the truth.
A narcissist has only one goal in all the relationships he builds and especially in romantic ones: he wants approval. When this guy first met you, he knew that you could be a good victim of his manipulations because he saw that you were enchanted by him. He saw that he had managed to impress you and that is exactly what he has been looking for his entire life. So if you want to really hurt him, you need to change your ways of dealing with him.
Instead of constantly complimenting and praising him, you need to focus on his flaws and imperfections. But for you to do this, you need to take off your rose-tinted glasses and see this guy for who he really is and that will help you see that he is far from perfect. Once you achieve this, you need to make sure to constantly imply his flaws to him.
You don’t need to insult him directly. Instead, give him doubt about his physical appearance or about his brain. This is the biggest punishment for a narcissist. He will never stop feeling insecure, the way he wanted to make you feel, and he will start to question his every move because he has an uncontrollable urge to be perfect in everyone’s eyes and especially in the eyes of his current victim. Therefore, this guy will do everything in his power to get your approval and to regain your admiration because that is what feeds him spiritually.
